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Shabbat salutes seniors who have stories to tell

By Gerry Greber
San Diego Jewish Press-Heritage, January 3, 2003

Individuals who have lived 80 to 90 years and beyond and still have active lives have many interesting stories to tell.

This was the theme of a Shabbat program on Friday, Dec. 27, at Temple Etz Rimon in Carlsbad. Called "A Slice of Life," the program was filled with
food, fun and freilich. Nesta Aharoni, wife of the Reform congregationšs president and founder, Eitan Aharoni, gave a great deal of thought how to honor a wonderful group of people who have contributed much to their synagogue.

"I felt that it would be an interesting experience for the participants to express how they felt about their lives in Europe and the United States,"
she said.

The honorees were Louis Garfein, Clarice Garfin, Murray Blackman, Betty Wicksman, Irving Bengelsdorf, Mildred Rose, Rabbi Mel Weinman, Eva Weiner, Arnold Farber and Lily Lewis. They were a diverse group with quite different lives. Among them they represented chicken farming, lobbying, science, business, the rabbinate and homemaking.


Temple Etz Ramon of Carlsbad honored these seniors during Shabbat services on Dec. 27. Standing, from left: Mildred Rose, Louis Garfein,
 Rabbi Mel Weinman, Lily Lewis, Murray Balckman, Dr. Irving S. Bengelsdorf and Arnold Farber. Seated: Clarice Garfein, Eva Weiner and Betty
Wicksman.  Heritage photo  by Gerry Greber



Although their usual spiritual leader, Rabbi Mel Weinman, was among the honorees, the service on this occasion was conducted by cantorial soloist
Jeff Wayne.

Like the honorees, the speakers came from diverse cultural backgrounds. Some were born in eastern Europe or England and spoke of the trials and
tribulations their families had to endure to survive the harshness of the times. Those born in the United States spoke of similar issues in slightly
different terms. But they had one common thread among them: All their families spoke Yiddish, which played an important part in their upbringing.
Along with the misfortunes that they had to endure, they also spoke of themany simchas that they enjoyed during these times. There were descriptions
of some of the humorous moments they experienced.

Murray Blackman, brought up in the United States, spoke of his first experience of eating at someone elsešs home. It occurred at a boarding house
during his first day at an out-of-town college. It was nonkosher, of course, but he said he looked around at the people and "they all looked healthy, so
I ate the food." The audience laughed.

Several individuals, including Rabbi Weinman, remembered when they were children that they would run around the synagogue on the holidays and cause disturbances during the services. He remembered an occasion when the kids were making an exceptionally loud disturbance and the shamus bellowed: "For Christ sake kids, loz davening." This really struck a funny note with the group.

It was a nostalgic evening. The reminiscences were funny, moving and often inspiring. The honorees told tales of their youths, of their experiences of
being brought up in the Orthodox manner, their family struggles through the 1930s Depression, their own personal trials and tribulations, and their
successes of later years. Some stories were quite poignant.

Among the honorees was Dr. Irving Bengelsdorf, a former science editor of the Los Angeles Times who now is a fellow volunteer writer for Heritage. He spoke of his entry into the field of science, which had not been open to Jews in the early 1940s. World War II changed all that. He mentioned that
Jews have contributed to the progress of science far in excess of their percentage of the population.

About halfway through the evening's festivities, the master of ceremonies, Jeff Wayne, gathered all the ladies together up front and serenaded them
with two special melodies: "You Must Have Been a Beautiful Baby" and "My Yiddishe Mama." The ladies ate it up.

Perry Allen was the warm-up speaker. He was a comedy writer who wrote for "Laugh-In," "McHalešs Navy" and other television shows. He also was a disk jockey here in San Diego on KOGO and KCBQ. He spoke about the "joys" of getting older, like telling the same story again and again and again, and other well-known jokes about aging "graciously." He was enthusiastically received with laughter and applause.

A special guest was present among the congregants: a guide dog-in-training called Wheaton. He attended with his Jewish trainer as part of his training
to get him used to all sorts of situations. Some of the congregants appeared surprised to see a dog in temple, but Wheaton did conduct himself in a most
dignified manner.

At the completion of each honoreešs presentation, the individual was presented with a plaque stating "Youth is a Gift of Nature; Age is a Work of
Art." The plaques were developed by Marilyn Clement, who also helped coordinate the program.